Saturday, 24 April 2010

A True Story

The following was found posted very low on a refrigerator door.

Dear Dogs and Cats:
The dishes with the paw prints are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food. Placing a pawprint in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.

The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Racing me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can run.

I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort, however. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other, stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out on the other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm.

For the last time, there is no secret exit from the bathroom! If, by some miracle, I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge in an attempt to open the door. I must exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for years - canine/feline attendance is not required.

The proper order for kissing is: Kiss me first, then go smell the other dog or cat's bottom. I cannot stress this enough!

"The little furry buggers are just deep, deep wells you throw all your emotions into." ~~ Bruce Schimmel

"Man, unlike the animals, has never learned that the sole purpose of life is to enjoy it." ~~ Samuel Butler


The expression on the faces of my cats Wilson and Ellie says it all...do you think they are listening!!! - March 2008

18 comments:

Silver said...

Got to agree with Samuel Butler's quote, that's for sure, girlfriend!

love & kisses,
~Silver

Aurora said...

Snicker.
I'll print it out for my cat right away - she looks disgusted already that I have so little clue as to who the boss REALLY is:)

Marja said...

Hilarious Peggie Hope the cat understands. I sometimes have a serious talk to our cat and she just stares at me, thinking I am crazy.

aynzan said...

HEHEHE!!!!Hilarious...What would they do if they really understood every word written!

Mike Smith said...

A good job your cats can't work computers. Or can they...?

miruspeg said...

Silver - I agree with the quote too girlfriend that's why I put it there....LOL! and hugs back to you. :)

Aurora - Yes our cats do give us 'THE LOOK' often which puts us in our place! ;)

Marja - I have given up having serious talks to my cats...it's like I am talking to the wall. When I am desperate I put them outside and shut the catdoor. But even then they bang on the catdoor wanting to be let in!!! Urgggg

Aynzan - Well if they understood every word, they would probably write me a letter telling ME what their needs and rules are....LOL.

Mike - Actually I think they can work the computer....I know they can type and press the on and off button. But I am on the computer most of the time so they don't get much practise....LOL. :)

McMGrad89 said...

Ha! It is amazing how much impact a pet can have on your life.

Great story.

Annemarie

Who you callin' housewife? said...

What is it with cats and the staircase? They are worse than roller skates.

MrsPeel said...

I like that: "the more I know people, the more I love my cat/dog/pet" quote....

and agree: if they could write, we would be getting the letters with the rules!!!
:)
love the photos PEggy,
Huggzzz

miruspeg said...

Annemarie - Anyone who has a pet would agree with that statement, but they certainly know how to press our buttons!
The story was sent by email and I had to share it.

..Housewife - Animals LOVE being underfoot....stairs, kitchen, hallways, if we are in a hurry they like to slow us down!

MrsPeel - I have that quote on a tile near my computer....the cats put it there!..LOL
Tah for your hugs Cynthia and here is a bucket load back. ((((hugs))))

Mommy2Twinkies-Deb said...

Peg-

All I can say at 2 am my time is... I can totally relate... as I move my bottom upstairs and into my bed with my gorgeous puppy.

Sweet Dreams,

Deb

miruspeg said...

Deb - I hope your gorgeous puppy is not too big and leaves enough room for you to stretch out.
I can visualise much puppy love in your household.
Big hugs from me to you and all your family. :)

Nina P. said...

Sounds like an ode to 4 legged friends. They do so capture your heart...and they know just how to play it too...those sad eyes, the purr and head /body rub... and the best of all, the tail flick... gets you every time. 9smiles) no wonder they have us wrapped around their paws. Blessings to you and yours. Love and light, Nina P

Stoneweaver said...

Hee hee! Where did you find that note? Whoever wrote it must be 'barking' - to think they would take a blind bit of notice!! :o)

miruspeg said...

Nina - Sounds like you are an animal lover too! They may drive us to drink sometimes but I hope I never have to live without a furry creature in my life. :)

Stoneweaver - It was sent to me by email from a lady I work with. I thought it was very clever because my cats do each and everything that is written in the letter.
Of course they take absolutely NO notice of it because they know who rules the household and we can whine all we want but in the end they always win!
Hope your mischief makers are getting on well. :^)

Cameron said...

Peggy, please visit my blog when you have a moment :)

Love the pic of your kitties, beautiful markings!

miruspeg said...

Cameron - I'm on my way over now and I am feeling really excited because I feel something special is about to come my way!:D

Cameron said...

Can't wait to see which clip will become yours! Always makes me giddy when someone finds something special in something I made with my 2 hands :)

My email address is cameron-art@att.net

Very interesting name coincidence...hmmm!